CRICKET ANECDOTES
15 seconds of fame
The scene, Melbourne. The year, 1920-'21. A certain Mrs. Park was sitting in the VIP enclosure, placidly knitting away. At one point, she fumbled and dropped her ball of wool. She bent, picked it up, dusted it off, and looked up. And realised that she had missed the entire international career of her husband, Roy Parks! The poor bloke, debuting in that game between England and Australia, was bowled by the only ball he ever faced in international cricket.
Over the wicket, into gully
Wanting to spread cricket around the globeis a most laudable objective. A story I read the other day would indicate, though, that we have some way to go, yet. This one comes from Italy, where I am told, the captain of the national side was injured recently, while fielding to the bowling of one of the premier bowlers in the Italian side. Said bowler bowled a wide, a wide so wide, it hit the bemused captain who was, at the time, fielding at gully!! The umpire must have dislocated his shoulders signalling that one -- if he hadn't bust a gut laughing, that is.
And now it's over to Giant Bronson
Brian Johnston of the BBC ranks among my favourite commentators -- if only because he provided moments of pure comedy while describing the on-field happenings. Like the time he shocked all listeners by saying, "Harvey is standing at leg slip with his legs apart, waiting for a tickle!" Or the time he referred to Asif Masood, the Pakistan pace bowler, as Massif Arsood. Or the time a huge black cloud floated over the ground, threatening further proceedings in an India-England match, and Brian Johnston -- or is that Giant Bronson? -- warbled, "There is a dirty black crowd here." But the most hilarious of Johnston's howlers (to enjoy it to the max, get someone to read this line out to you) was when he went, "The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey!"
Bitter halves
You may be a hero to the world, but to your wife you are just the bum she married. Ask the former Mrs Bhagwat Chandrasekhar. While the world raved about her husband's bowling prowess, she was least impressed. And when it came to his batting, she was even less so. Thus, the story is told of how, once, she called the ground while a match was in progress, and asked for her husband. "Sorry," said the factotum who answered the phone, "Chandra is just walking out to bat." "Oh, in that case," trilled Mrs Chandra, "no problem, I'll wait on the line!" Another remarkably unimpressed lady was the wife of the Rev David Sheppard, former England Test star. The reverend's catching skills were, certainly, not up there with his batting, but still, he must have gone a nice puce when, on tour to Australia once, he was approached by an English couple settled Down Under with a request: would the Reverend kindly christen their newborn child? "Oh no," chirped Mrs Sheppard, "not him, he's bound to drop the baby!"
Run with the hounds
Indian batsmen can't run between wickets too well, huh? And the Aussies are the world's best? Awright, check this out: In the 1950-'51 Ashes series, Australia's last wicket pair of Bill Johnston and Iverson were at the crease. Johnston edged Alec Bedser over the slips and, certain sure he had got a four, stopped halfway down the pitch for a little chat with the bowler. Iverson, meanwhile, was running up and down for all he was worth. He ran the first, then ran the second, then started off on the third. Meanwhile, Johnston noticed -- belatedly, but what the heck -- that not only had the ball been fielded inside the boundary, but the fielder, Reg Simpson, was in the act of throwing it back to keeper Godfrey Evans. Startled, Johnston began running back into his crease -- only to find that Iverson was running shoulder to shoulder with him, in the same direction, the whole taking on the appearance of a two-horse race. And what horses they were, too -- the gangly Johnston, famed for his inelegance, and the portly, waddling Iverson. Realising that disaster threatened, Iverson braked suddenly, turned, and began running back to the bowler's end -- pursued by the ball, which Evans had flung in that direction. He finally made it, just ahead of the ball. At that point, Iverson had effectively run 4, finishing up where he started from. Johnston had run a half run. And ultimately, no runs accrued to the batsman -- who, interestingly enough, was dismissed off the very next ball.
Source: photo:http://www.nicholsoncartoons.com.au/
15 seconds of fame
The scene, Melbourne. The year, 1920-'21. A certain Mrs. Park was sitting in the VIP enclosure, placidly knitting away. At one point, she fumbled and dropped her ball of wool. She bent, picked it up, dusted it off, and looked up. And realised that she had missed the entire international career of her husband, Roy Parks! The poor bloke, debuting in that game between England and Australia, was bowled by the only ball he ever faced in international cricket.
Over the wicket, into gully
Wanting to spread cricket around the globeis a most laudable objective. A story I read the other day would indicate, though, that we have some way to go, yet. This one comes from Italy, where I am told, the captain of the national side was injured recently, while fielding to the bowling of one of the premier bowlers in the Italian side. Said bowler bowled a wide, a wide so wide, it hit the bemused captain who was, at the time, fielding at gully!! The umpire must have dislocated his shoulders signalling that one -- if he hadn't bust a gut laughing, that is.
And now it's over to Giant Bronson
Brian Johnston of the BBC ranks among my favourite commentators -- if only because he provided moments of pure comedy while describing the on-field happenings. Like the time he shocked all listeners by saying, "Harvey is standing at leg slip with his legs apart, waiting for a tickle!" Or the time he referred to Asif Masood, the Pakistan pace bowler, as Massif Arsood. Or the time a huge black cloud floated over the ground, threatening further proceedings in an India-England match, and Brian Johnston -- or is that Giant Bronson? -- warbled, "There is a dirty black crowd here." But the most hilarious of Johnston's howlers (to enjoy it to the max, get someone to read this line out to you) was when he went, "The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey!"
Bitter halves
You may be a hero to the world, but to your wife you are just the bum she married. Ask the former Mrs Bhagwat Chandrasekhar. While the world raved about her husband's bowling prowess, she was least impressed. And when it came to his batting, she was even less so. Thus, the story is told of how, once, she called the ground while a match was in progress, and asked for her husband. "Sorry," said the factotum who answered the phone, "Chandra is just walking out to bat." "Oh, in that case," trilled Mrs Chandra, "no problem, I'll wait on the line!" Another remarkably unimpressed lady was the wife of the Rev David Sheppard, former England Test star. The reverend's catching skills were, certainly, not up there with his batting, but still, he must have gone a nice puce when, on tour to Australia once, he was approached by an English couple settled Down Under with a request: would the Reverend kindly christen their newborn child? "Oh no," chirped Mrs Sheppard, "not him, he's bound to drop the baby!"
Run with the hounds
Indian batsmen can't run between wickets too well, huh? And the Aussies are the world's best? Awright, check this out: In the 1950-'51 Ashes series, Australia's last wicket pair of Bill Johnston and Iverson were at the crease. Johnston edged Alec Bedser over the slips and, certain sure he had got a four, stopped halfway down the pitch for a little chat with the bowler. Iverson, meanwhile, was running up and down for all he was worth. He ran the first, then ran the second, then started off on the third. Meanwhile, Johnston noticed -- belatedly, but what the heck -- that not only had the ball been fielded inside the boundary, but the fielder, Reg Simpson, was in the act of throwing it back to keeper Godfrey Evans. Startled, Johnston began running back into his crease -- only to find that Iverson was running shoulder to shoulder with him, in the same direction, the whole taking on the appearance of a two-horse race. And what horses they were, too -- the gangly Johnston, famed for his inelegance, and the portly, waddling Iverson. Realising that disaster threatened, Iverson braked suddenly, turned, and began running back to the bowler's end -- pursued by the ball, which Evans had flung in that direction. He finally made it, just ahead of the ball. At that point, Iverson had effectively run 4, finishing up where he started from. Johnston had run a half run. And ultimately, no runs accrued to the batsman -- who, interestingly enough, was dismissed off the very next ball.
Source: photo:http://www.nicholsoncartoons.com.au/
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